"He slept under the moon,
he basked under the sun.
He lived a life of going to do,
and died with nothing done."
And I have feared these words like evil spirits for as long as I can take my mind back. Everyday, I face a 'going-to-do', the days almost invariably wither with nothing done. Time dipped deep in thankless jobs of the day (they call it 'Tempo' down here). I am still of a victim of the strong currents that flow in this air, air beautifuly laced with arsenic. It is now hard( almost impossible?) for me to now re-realise that this is the soil where I so badly wanted to land upon.I have taken to blogging, my newly found alternative to verbal cribbing and nagging. I don't know how long will this sustain, as I have run out of writer's tapping (ink is now outdated, writers are now tappers). Another bane of the arsenic. I have failed to understand and state what is that assigned task that the almighty sent me with. Is it to just sit back and listen to other's (vague) victories? Or cram lessons from beaming demure dolls about stories of one particular "GOD" played what stunt to get what, while I sit clicking my mouse to demolish monsters?
I read confused. Believe me I am. I am also a self made persecutee of my own silence. This silence is another arsenic.
Last night, when it was dark and there was no one to torch the surroundings,I saw a thousand more stars in my sky than on a night before. And thence, in Floyd-al philosophy,
"I knew the moment had arrived
For killing the past and coming back to life "
Now is the time for some vodka and grass. Muster up the all showy courage of a man high on narcs and make it up there.
By the way, don't you feel special to be ordinary?
3 comments:
Puts tera dimag kharab that ye to bachpan se hi certified hai...
Pehle IIT mein jaane ke liye pagal thi,ab vahan reh kar pagal ho rahi hai....
Abe stupid,kaise to khush reh yaar!!!!!
Puts I must say,u r really lucky to have Amit with you to take care of u.He's going but he has made u strong and matured enough that u spend the rest 2/3 years there with peace and elan and shine there like a bright star.And as far as the routine grind is concerned,fuck the routine once in a while and make sure u go back to the routine life with a 'chak de fatte'spirit.
take care...
cheers...
The purpose for your existance is perhaps something which will be revealed in the path of self discovery.
And about your last question. .... well it feels special to be different .... for me being different is perhaps the only way of convincing myself that i am alive.
i think coke will have something to say about this
well, dep beti ... it's a dog's life and life's a bitch. and believe me when I say it is seriously tough for some people(read Pisceans)to actually even try to live in this world, what with all its mundane routine. I myself am in the search of answers, and I am not sure of the questions yet. Astrologers reason this state of (confused)being with the fact that we(Pisceans) are supposed to be in the final life-cycle in this place...we've basically been there done that...this life is supposedly only for the quest for the (ever eluding)truth......
as for dealing with life as it is, one thing tht I have realised is that there is nothing in life that actually holds my interest for long : there's this never ending thirst for something. and whatever I enjoy doing is what takes my mind off the basic problem: reality.
The only source of constant happiness in my life is the ability to regularly find temporary sources of happiness...probably the same is with you...anyways,hope we do find that highly coveted TRUTH.
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